1/7 Erio Touwa (AlphaMax)

Denpa Onna to Seishin Otoko isn't something I usually pick up voluntarily, but thanks to its WTF opening I had to give it a try. It didn't take long for me to realize Erio Touwa is probably the most fascinating moe-blob out there. Seriously. I watched the entire series because of her.

So even Alpha Max's reputation for mediocre products, I pre-ordered this figure. Why? Because it's ham. Because it's delicious ham.

1/8 Misaka Mikoto (GSC)

It's about time I got to reviewing some older figures! My backlog on reviews is so stupendous it pierces the heavens (What? Nevermind). So without further ado, here is a retro-review for your enjoyment!

Misaka Mikoto is a small girl who fights gundams with her bare hands. That alone makes her awesome. Unfortunately, Misaka Mikoto isn't the most colourful person in the world, and her bland design translates to an equally mundane figure—or does it?

Ideolo's Black♣Album 2 (Doujinshi)

I've hunted Ideolo's doujinshi since I was made aware of their existence, yet somehow, they've always eluded my grubby little fingers. UNTIL NOW.

Ideolo's Touhou series is the epitome of high-contrast stylization. The colours are bright enough to punch your retina right in the cones. The heavy blacks are stark and uncompromising. Such abusive boldness can only signify greatness. Read on.

Wonder Nyan/Meow (Square Enix)

Look in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's...It's...Wonder Nyan, the dream eater from Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance! He's stuffed with awesome and he stares at you with an expression that lacks emotion!  He's adorable and plump, and all you want to do is give him a hug! Or even a poke!

Wonder Nyan can be your buddy and your pillow too!  He's got all sorts of uses!  Let's see what else makes Wonder Nyan so wonderful in this review!

April: LET THE RAINS BEGIN

April showers bring May flowers, but no one gives two farts about flowerrs at Poke the Merch. Now if April showers brought May merchandise we might care, but that's illogical and impossible to boot. Besides, nothing that rhymes with "merchandise" would make a cohesive poem, so we're not even going to try.

That being said, April has its own slew of beautiful materialistic wallet-eaters that require attention. So what are you waiting for?